Tag: gay culture

POPPERS AND AROMAS BLOG

 

Nearly everyone who has read this blog will know that I like Poppers. Poppers can be purchased legally in Australia from a Pharmacist and Illegally from sex shops and other sex on site venues, although there doesn’t seem to be a desire to crack down on these sales yet. In other countries around the world their legal sale and use varies and it’ important that you make sure you check the laws of your local area if you are considering purchasing or using them.

Popper-bating porn is becoming increasingly popular and hard to find and the use of aromas and poppers is a murky area most platforms are unwilling to open a dialogue about. I recently had to make significant changes to my Onlyfans content in order to comply with the platforms TOS. Although the use of poppers is not strictly illegal in Australia OF includes them in a blanket ban which it applies to all of its content creators around the world.

One excellent blog I have found on the subject is Poppers and Aromas Blog. If you’re curious, an occasional user or even a huff pig you’ll find it a great source of information and advice on all things poppers and aromas.

CLICK HERE TO GO TO POPPERS AND AROMAS BLOG

Gay 101. Poppers and their side effects.

Many of you have seen me using poppers in my videos. So I think that this is a good time to reshare this post on the possible side effects of using poppers. Like all things it’s up to you to make informed choices. Although I enjoy using them during sex and in my videos I have been steadily reducing my use of them for sex.  I used to rely on them a lot and over used them. Now how I use them is much more moderated and reduced.

Many of you will have heard the of poppers or know them by their other name “Amyl”. It is a liquid chemical usually sold in a small glass bottle which is sniffed or “huffed”.

It’s quite common around the Gay scene to see people using “Amyl”. Some use it to enhance sex, others use it for a rush on the dance floor. It’s seen as a generally harmless “drug” and is available around the world in Sex shops and online.

If you’re bottoming inhaling poppers can relax your ass muscles and make bottoming easier and more enjoyable. I use them for this purpose, they make me feel horny and really let me relax. They are widely available here in Australia and it’s common to see gas huffing in saunas and on club dance floors.

If you’re a Top the euphoria and sense of arousal can harden your dick and make your cock more sensitive.

However you use it, there are side effects that you should consider and I have been making an effort myself to reduce my use of poppers steadily over the last few years.

I am not a medical professional. If you are concerned about using poppers or their side effects then you should speak to a Doctor.

Inhaling Amyl relaxes the smooth muscles throughout the body including the sphincter in the anus. This is why many Gay men use it to enhance sex. The relaxation of these smooth muscles causes the blood vessels in these muscles to dilate, resulting in increased heart rate and the warm rush and excitement you feel around your body as well as the feeling of being sexually aroused.

Possible Side effects.

Firstly you should know Poppers are illegal in some parts of the world.

Poppers if over used can bring on the holy mother of all headaches. It can burn if spilt on the skin and cause coma or death if ingested.

Overuse can cause vomiting, nausea, headache, blurred vision and low blood pressure.

Some individuals may experience erectile problems. 

Poppers have been linked to increased risk of Glaucoma and loss of vision.

The feeling of euphoria and increased “horniness” can also lead to more risky sexual behaviour. The use of poppers have been linked to injuries and the increased transmission of STD’s during sex.

Poppers can also interact with some medications including Viagra which can lead to a heart attack or stroke. If you are using medications then you should speak to your Doctor about the dangers of mixing them with Amyl.

 

LOCKED BOY DIARY -TRUST – You can’t do kink without it.

Trust is a key element of any partnership but in a kink partnership I have found it even more so, especially when you are using restrains or engaging in risky things like breath play.

I have come to realise that Sir ( my Dom ) is a Unicorn.

Sir has been very careful to build my trust in him and the result is that I have become much more open to things that would have been limits for me previously. In the past there simply hasn’t been enough trust for me to fully give myself over to previous doms. Willing submission is a key tenet of kink play, it cannot occur without trust and trust requires open communication and respect for limits.

Sirs training recently has begun to include breath play (choking ) and deep throating. Both of these are things that I have been keen to try but which require a lot of trust. In the past I haven’t felt comfortable enough with my partners to really enjoy this. Yesterdays session with Sir was the first time that I felt really confident enough to give myself over completely to Sir and put my safety in his hands. The result was that we both reached a new level of enjoyment I hadn’t experienced before.

So how do you build trust in a kink partnership?

Open communication without slut shaming or judgement is incredibly important.

A sub should feel like they can share anything with their dom about what they enjoy and what their limits are.

Slut shaming your sub can make them feel unworthy or that their own needs are unreasonable. This is never the case and if you are a sub you should not submit yourself to a dom who treats you in this way.

Slut shaming or judging your sub can also lead to them taking risks, keeping quiet about their limits, or not stopping play that causes them an injury. This is unacceptable, it can leave your sub depressed and even feeling abused. As a dom you are responsible for your subs safety and well being, mind AND body.

Knowing what you are both interested in will make training far more satisfying physically and mentally. In the past I have had doms who were only concerned with their own needs and disregarded their subs as “just there to serve”. Why would I submit willingly to a dom who does nothing for me?

Respect limits.

It’s impossible to trust someone who consistently does things you have told them not too.

A dom who does not respect limits does not understand consent and is unworthy of your service.

NO MEANS NO!

As a sub always remember your limits are to be respected and play must be consensual. A dom may push your limits if you have spoken about what is acceptable to you. Sometimes pushing a limit can expand your experience and help you reach new levels of enjoyment. To facilitate this always use safe words and something like the “red, yellow, green” system.

Red = STOP IMMEDIATELY.

Yellow = I’m reaching my limit but I’m okay to keep going.

Green = Please continue.

As a dom you must respect your sub and their limits if you are to create a partnership that is meaningful and lasting. Training takes time and each time your sub realises that they are safe they may consent to go a little further, this is how we push the boundaries safely.

 

Lockdown hookups.

Well here we are at the beginning of week four of six of the second lockdown here in Melbourne. All our figures are dropping and thats great but one thing that hasn’t dropped is the number of hookup requests I’ve been getting. I haven’t been on Grindr in aaaaages but I still get messages from guys online through my socials asking when we will be able to hookup.

Hookup culture sucks at the best of times but in the middle of a pandemic it’s even more dangerous. I guess one of the hardest things for me about this whole situation has been realising that there are some people out there who we will just never be able to reach with the message to do the right thing. There are just too many of us ( the gay community ) out there putting our need to get our dicks wet before keeping each other safe.

The first weekend of this second lockdown I got a message, “three tops here”. Fuck I wanted to go over so badly. Three keen Tops in the one place is like catching lightning in a bottle and the chances of me getting COVID from any of them was pretty small, but I still said no and here’s why.

I don’t want to be part of the legacy of selfishness that is adding to the hurt of so many people out there. People are losing their jobs, homes and lives because of people who thought it couldn’t happen to them. Who lawyered the risks in their head so they could justify doing whatever they wanted and who have contributed to the current situation we are in. I can’t make people do the right thing, but I can choose to do it myself. I can’t stop what’s happening, but I can control my own behaviour.

It’s fucking hard staying indoors, giving up sex, missing out on enjoying the sunshine with my friends, I get it. It’s depressing not having those supports around me and not seeing my family in almost 4 months, but whats the alternative? I look at my feeds everyday and see people partying and ignoring social distancing advice and it gives me FOMO but even more it makes me angry that friends would put each other at risk.

I’d also love to be out hooking up and making content for you. There are only so many solos you can do. But it’s important to me to do the right thing. So thank you everybody for following and for your support during this time. This too will pass and we will all be on the beers together again soon.

 

LOCKED BOY DIARY – Upgraded to stainless steel.

About a month ago I ordered a new stainless steel chastity cage to upgrade my Holy Trainer Maxi.

I love the HT, it has been my most comfortable cage so far but I’ve been wearing it everyday and the plastic sadly isn’t holding up. The ring is bent and the lock has worn down so that the whole thing pops apart on its own with a little bit of pressure. The loose joints also catch the skin and so it’s time to upgrade.

My new stainless steel cage is not just more secure but also looks and feels more permanent than the plastic. I love the design of the HT so finding something with the same fit and aesthetic was important to me. The cage I found is from Amazon. I was careful ordering it because sizing can be tricky at the best of times and the quality of these cages can be poor if you aren’t careful with your choice. It took me some searching to find the one I liked. Many of the metal cages I saw look like bird cages which I don’t like, I wanted something more anatomically correct and enclosed. I am uncut and getting the ole foreskin caught in a cage is as painful as getting it caught in your zipper.

When you open the package it’s important to make sure you wash it thoroughly and check for any mould lines or sharp edges before you put it on. This particular cage feels really solid, wearing it feels a lot more snug than the plastic cage which bends and flexes when I get hard(ish). I got really lucky with this the sizing of this one, I deliberately went for the largest size. Having worn the HT before gave me a really good sense of the sizing I would need. It fits great and is almost the perfect size for me. The weight of it feels good too, its not too heavy to wear without underwear and bounces quite nicely when going commando in basketball shorts although id probably wear a jockstrap for gym or sport to prevent chaffing. It’s slightly smaller than my HT Maxi so it’s slightly more discrete. It still pinches and chaffs occasionally but it’s definitely more comfortable and the metal stays nice and warm.

I know there are those of you who would like to see me free again but thats just not where my head is at the moment. Being locked makes me more creative, makes sex more enjoyable and just fits with my sexual identity as a sub. Having now spent 24 hours in it, I’m confident that I’ll be able the reach day 200 and beyond.

 

 

 

It’s not just a collar – A quick look at Sirs collar and what it means.

Apart from chastity the thing that I get asked about the most is Sirs collar. In the Kink community and personally my collar is not about playing dress up. In the wider Gay community harnesses, collars and other Kink accoutrements are often worn as costume and although I’m pleased to see that kink is becoming more mainstream each item I wear is important to me.

My collar was custom made for me by Sir. That in itself means a lot to me because it symbolises Sirs personal commitment to me as Sirs boy. Sirs collar with its padlock represents his ownership of this boy and my submission to his authority over my body and certain agreed aspects of my life. This ownership requires that I will serve him and be available for his pleasure when required. It means that this boys body now belongs to Sir and that this boys pleasure is Sirs to give and take away as he pleases. Violations of this will bring punishment.

Sirs collar does not only show this boys commitment but also shows Sirs commitment to take on the responsibility for my training and take me under his protection. This means that I am not available for use by other Doms without his permission.

A collar is not something that a Master gives lightly, it took three months of commitment and training before Sir decided I was worthy of wearing his collar. It is not something that should be accepted lightly either. It is a symbol of commitment, Sir and I have a contract which clearly outlines the terms of our partnership. Both of us have responsibilities to each other built on mutual enjoyment and respectful conduct.

There are a variety of collars which mean different things and now that wearing a collar has become more mainstream within the Kink and wider Gay communities it’s important to know that they are not always about “dressing up”. Everybody’s kink is personal and unique if you meet somebody wearing a collar and are not sure what it means then just ask and as always be respectful.

Sirs training collar. A non permanent collar which this boy wore during training.
Sirs ownership collar awarded after the boy has proven his commitment to Sir and his training. Note the padlock indicating that this boy is not available without Sirs permission.

 

Ranty.

I’ve always been a little bit volatile, my responses to things that bother me have always been highly emotional. I used to be in control of those reactions but not so much anymore. Thats partly why I prefer to write my posts rather than make videos because it gives me a chance to draft and check my writing. Often a first draft is very emotional if its something that I’m passionate about and I can often comes across very angry. I used to be able to let things that bothered me just slide and I was better at letting go of things that just don’t matter, but I’ve noticed lately that I’ve been getting very ranty and negative, especially online. I used to try and keep my responses at least partially measured and thoughtful but lately my attitude has been “I’m over being nice”.

The problem is that I let things bother me now that would never have bothered me before. Small slights, Facebook posts, and all kinds of horrible things that people do set me off. Is it a personality trait coming out or is there something more to it and have I allowed myself to get swept up in cancel culture and the current climate of combative opinion?

Today I shared an Instagram profile about all the Karens who are making idiots of themselves. It’s a collection of all the worst videos of these people. What they are doing is horrendous and I immediately shared it. Later as I was walking to the shops I was reminded of an episode of The Orville where they visit a planet where there is no judicial system, everybody gets judged and sentenced by social media. People wiht poor ratings miss out on services and if you get judged really badly and you get lobotomised. It bothered me, although these were terrible people saying terrible things, that I was part of the mob, observing, sharing and sentencing. These people should be shamed but I don’t like mob justice and who am I to decided these things anyway?

Earlier today I rather abruptly responded to friends facebook post. It wasn’t even that the post was bad, I just popped a gasket and blew up. I ended up deleting the post and removing myself from the room. I worry that I’m turning in to a grumpy old man. My friends have even said it. I used to be so positive and easy going but now I allow things to trigger me that wouldn’t have in the past.

What’s going on?

LOCKED BOY DIARY – Collared

 

This weekend Sir collared me. For those of you not familiar with Dom/sub relationships when a Dom collars a boy it means that Sir is taking ownership of the boy. It is a significant sign of Sirs commitment and appreciation to make a collar for his boy. Ownership means that Sir is committed to training and using the boy for his pleasure and the boy submits to Sirs authority alone. Each Dom/sub relationship is unique and is not necessarily romantic and the boundaries and expectations require an open negotiation.

Sir now holds keys for my chastity cage and collar and I have submitted to him completely.

I have been searching for a Dom to commit to in this way for along time and earning my collar comes with some sense of pride. Sir has given me permission to share some of my experiences with you and I am looking forward to this next step in my training. It is a privilege to serve Sir.

Have you had a similar experience? leave a comment below and share your story.