Gay 101. Can opposites really attract?

underwear500aWhen I was a brand new skinny Twink,  all shiny and bouncy I quickly discovered that I was attracted to fit muscular Jocks. Okay nothing new there you may say, but I also learned that as a general rule the guys I was attracted too were mostly only attracted to guys like themselves. I felt invisible to anyone over six foot with pecs and abs and I largely still do. We all know about Gay superficialness (is that even a word?) and we constantly see crowds of fit muscly guys who stick together moving from one circuit party to the next.

I eventually gave up trying to pick up the gym boys, although I never stopped hoping. Soon I thought, if you can’t beat them… join them. I hit the gym, chugged down protein shakes and stuffed myself with chicken breasts. Slowly as my body began to grow the muscle boys began to notice me. I bought in to the whole “gotta get big to be attractive” fallacy. But my body doesn’t do “big and muscly” and I have always stayed on the smaller side of the scales. I also noticed that no matter how much my body yoyo’d from Twink to Twunk to Jock and back again I still wasn’t attracting the guys I really wanted because I didn’t have the swagger to pull it off.


It was around this time that my view of myself also began to change. I grew more confident as my life experience began to add up. I eventually arrived at the understanding that everybody likes something different, and that the guys who were only interested in guys who were the same as them were not attractive to me anyway. I began to grown in to myself and appreciate what made me different.

Confidence is sexy. I’m by no means a Twink anymore but neither am I a pumped up circuit boy, yet without any exaggeration lately I have been punching above my weight. Surprise surprise, there are some very physically imposing men out there who like a slimmer guy to throw around the bedroom or a park bench. The difference now is that I’m less desperate to be one of them and happier to be myself and that’s what’s working for me. Yes I’m still invisible to most guys over six foot with pecs and abs but now I know I don’t need to be one of them to bag one of them.

So if you’re a skinny guy fretting over a muscle guy ask yourself this,

If I need to break myself at the gym just to get noticed by this guy, is he really worth getting noticed by?

Skinny boys your muscle boys are out there… be confident and go forth and sexify!


5 thoughts on “Gay 101. Can opposites really attract?

  • September 9, 2014 at 10:42 pm

    You have the gift of translating into words ouro lives and feelings. Thank you so much! Misses from Brazil

  • September 10, 2014 at 1:19 am

    Very cool post. You’d get my attention every time. I love the smaller guys. Not to throw around, but to be gentle and have fun with.

    Peace <3

  • September 10, 2014 at 3:18 pm

    Thank you for sharing your thought. It certainly reflected how I felt years ago. I’m slim and was attracted to muscular jocks. But I found my partner (with a normal bod) whom loves me for who I’m and not my physical attributes (well, he loves that I’m slim). While I still enjoy looking at muscles, I suppose it’s the connection that’s the most important. Just be yourself and most importantly, be comfortable with who you are (not who you like to be) ^_^

  • September 10, 2014 at 9:05 pm

    I particularly liked the bit about the park bench. I enjoyed my 5 years in England. Sounds like you are adjusting to the “fullest”.

  • October 29, 2014 at 2:29 am

    Shannon, I am no where near a stereotypical gay gym rat, I am 6’4″ 300 and a few pounds, and way past you in years, but you have NEVER been invisible to me, and even though I don’t sport the kind of body to which you would be attracted, I would hug you just the same 😉



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